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5 Ways to Be a Good Cyborg

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More than half of all working adults carry a smartphone on their person, and this figure has been increasing exponentially every year. The next trend in mobile technology is even more personal with devices that users can wear, such as smart glasses and watches. The proliferation of these personal devices is bringing the population one step closer to becoming cyborgs.

Technology is great at connecting people from all over the world, but it’s still important to be mindful of how cyborg technology affects people in the same room. A cyborg is a part human and part machine life form that will stick out in a crowd of full-blooded humans.

For example, think of fictions most famous cyborg, Darth Vader. Now think of the Star Wars Sith Lord standing in line at your local coffee shop waiting for his cup of caramel frappuccino. Lord Vader would stand out because of his black cape and shiny helmet, but one of the most distracting features of Vader’s outfit is his wearable technology that helps him breathe. As people stand in line, they would be distracted and unable to talk over the loud “khoooo-puuuhhh” noise coming from behind them.

If you are distracting others with your own wearable cyborg technology, then you might as well dress like Darth Vader because everybody is staring at you. There are even some cyborgs that wear tech like smart glasses for the sole purpose of attracting attention. Cyborgs like this are kind of like Sith Lords because they have the ability to channel the negative energy around them and become more powerful.

Technologies like mobile devices and wearable tech are designed to improve the human species, not to annoy them. For all you cyborgs that love your personal devices, here are 5 tips to help you not come off as a science fiction villain.

Don’t Show Off
If somebody wants to know about your new smartphone, they will ask you about it. There’s no need to approach a co-worker and say, “Hey, look at my new phone!” Not everyone shares your enthusiasm.

Your Video Capabilities Make People Nervous
If you’re in public and wearing smart glasses, just know that everyone assumes you are recording their every move with your built in camera. You will especially want to keep this in mind when using a public restroom.

Be Fully Present
When having a face-to-face conversation with a full-blooded human, understand that they will expect you to act like a human, not a cyborg. Cyborgs are incapable of being fully present in conversations because their device is constantly blinking and making noises, which takes priority over things like eye contact and words.

Only Speak Cyborg to Other Cyborgs
010000110110001. If you are communicating with a group of humans, and you won’t shut up about your mobile device and apps, then as far as humans are concerned, you might as well be speaking in binary code.

Just Because There’s an App for that, Doesn’t Mean it’s Interesting
When a human wants to know what the weather is like, they step outside, not check a weather app like a cyborg. Humans will buy real thank you cards, leave tweeting to birds, and tell someone happy birthday with a physical gift. A cyborg has apps for all of these activities, but that doesn’t mean apps are better than the ways of the humans, don’t act like they are.

With half the population using mobile devices and transforming into cyborgs, there will be a misunderstanding of the cyborg’s ways until this transformation is complete. As a good cyborg, you will want to learn the social habits of the humans. You can even try shutting down your cyborg half when socially engaging with a human; this will make it easier to communicate and not scare off people with your cyborg ways.

Do you speak cyborg, or are you are a human that fears cyborgs? Let us know where your loyalties lie in the comments!